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JUST IN: Swindon Town Manager Ian Holloway Breaks Silence, “Honestly Can’t Take It Anymore,” Invites Wife for Sage Ritual on Haunted Training Ground

JUST IN: Swindon Town Manager Ian Holloway Breaks Silence, “Honestly Can’t Take It Anymore,” Invites Wife for Sage Ritual on Haunted Training Ground

Swindon Town manager Ian Holloway has revealed his frustration over his team’s disastrous form, admitting he “can’t take it anymore” and resorting to unconventional measures to lift their fortunes. After a season marred by injuries and poor results, Holloway has turned to what he believes might be the answer to his team’s woes: a sage ritual, to be conducted by his wife, to cleanse their training ground.

Holloway, visibly agitated by Swindon’s current position near the bottom of League Two, described strange occurrences at their Beversbrook Sports and Community Facility in Calne, Wiltshire. With key players like Ollie Clarke and Ryan Delaney sidelined due to injury, Holloway is convinced that the team’s struggles are linked to the area’s proximity to an ancient burial site—allegedly a source of bad luck.

“I’ve had enough,” Holloway confessed. “The results have been brutal, and we can’t seem to catch a break. People around here keep telling me it’s haunted, and honestly, I can’t take it anymore. I’m going to get my wife to come up with her sage and do a cleansing because we need something to change.”

Despite the bizarre nature of his plan, Holloway remains optimistic. “I know it sounds strange, but when you’ve tried everything else, you start looking at alternative solutions. I’m not sure I believe in ghosts or curses, but I’ll do anything to turn this around. If it helps, I’m all in.”

Holloway’s comments come after Swindon’s disastrous run of form, having not won in the league since mid-September. They are currently languishing in 22nd place, with injuries piling up for key players. Holloway’s unorthodox approach recalls the legendary story of Barry Fry in 1993, who famously urinated on the corners of the pitch at St. Andrew’s to end a curse. However, Holloway was quick to distance himself from such drastic measures, adding with a chuckle, “I won’t be doing what Barry did, that’s for sure.”

As Holloway looks to reverse his team’s fortunes, he’s holding out hope that a touch of the mystical might just do the trick. “It can’t hurt, can it?” he remarked, with a wry smile. “Let’s see if a little bit of cleansing can bring us some luck.”

 

Written by Otsapa Victory

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